Without Further Ado

I will go ahead and start writing my first post. This is not a blog specifically about dating or relationships, but it’s a good topic for the first post; might catch people’s attention. Well, it’s not just about relationships, it’s also about…you guessed it…covid (yeah, I don’t capitalize it anymore). Specifically, about covid etiquette in relationships (there, two impressive topics). There has been a great deal of discussion on the constitution of households, families, bubbles, etc., for covid purposes. Well, a lot of those, I believe, are useless categories; for instance, college students claiming their dorm floor is a “covid bubble” within which they don’t need to wear masks. Within my own home, however, I have exercised very high standards of health safety. Other than the Kid (likely a recurrent character in my posts), I invited a lovely person with whom I had been in a relationship to spend the pandemic months with me and the Kid, adhering to all of my insane standards. It worked out fabulously and we made a very nice pandemic family.

As the schools went on winter break, he informed me that he had made plans to go spend the break with his child, who would be returning from a college campus and also visiting the ex-wife’s home. After the break, he would return to my home. Umm….what?….wait….We don’t interact with anyone outside my home in order for this quarantine thing to work. But what? I dare tell a father not to see his child? Well, no, of course not. But, actually, my opinionated self thinks that college students (being adults and all) could actually stay put for the break. But no, of course, I won’t tell you not to see your child. But here is what I will say: if you choose to spend the pandemic in my home for months and then choose to leave the household, you should involve me in the decision making. That is respect. You ask me what I would be comfortable with in terms of your foray into the “outside” world. And, yes, family members outside of your “covid household” are the outside world (and don’t get me started on college campuses). This is not about coming between a parent and a child. This is about respect and covid etiquette in relationships. My gripe: consult with me before making your holiday plans and ask me what my level of comfort would be regarding your return without a quarantine period. Yeah, I’m one of those women who don’t like to be *told* that decisions that affect them have already been made.

But I was good. I simply insisted on a 14-day quarantine before returning to my home. But it was his child! How could I insist on a quarantine? Do I not trust him? I do, of course. I kind of don’t trust that horrible little virus.

Lesson / advice: Be respectful of people who have thrown in their lot with you during this difficult time. And always be respectful of women you are dating. And never ignore them when making decisions that impact their well-being. And always take them seriously.



Published by sonagoldstein

I’m a mother, a teacher, and a social observer. I have always enjoyed my internal dialogue in response to random situations in my life, and have decided to share my thoughts with others.

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